Our friend Mike doesn't watch any sort of basketball, but he loves to use stupid systems to pick his NCAA bracket every season. This year, he went with a team's best names. This is simply too good not to post. In the first round, a team's entire roster will be considered. Beyond that, only a team's superstar name (not the same as the name of the team's superstar) will be considered. His analysis follows. (Also, apologies on formatting -- I will try to fix it later.)
1st Round:
Memphis: Chance McGrady, Doneal Mack
Texas Arlington: Dwight Gentry II, Jermaine Griffin, Cardell Hunter, Marquez Haynes, Rog'er Guignard
While Texas has a lot going for it (huge points for the unnecessary and most likely ungrammatical apostrophe in Mr. Guignard’s name), I have to give it to Memphis for Chance McGrady.
Mississippi State: Riley Benock, Kodi Augustus
Oregon: Bryce Taylor, Churchill Odia, LeKendric Longmire
Michigan State: Marquise Gray, Durrell Summers
Temple: Dionte Christmas
Christmas as a last name beats what probably should be a title , both of which would get blown out of the water by Christmas as a first name
Pittsburgh: Keith Benjamin, Cassin Diggs
Oral Roberts: Adam Liberty
Two first names always make for a strong name. Also, after much deliberation, it was decided that the quality of the school’s name should not affect this bracket
Marquette: Dominic James, Lawrence Blackledge, Lazar Hayward
Kentucky: Ramel Bradley
Stanford: Landry Fields, Taj Finger
Cornell: Jason Battle, Adam Gore, Jon Jaques
For some reason, Landry Fields wins
Miami Fla: Eddie Rios, Lance Hurdle, Fabio Nass, Landon Glover, Julian Gamble
St. Mary’s: Tron Smith, Wayne Hunter
Tron is pretty good, but Miami is a juggernaut.
Texas: Alexis Wangmene, Damion James, D.J. Augustin, Harrison Smith, Dexter Pittman, Clint Chapman
Austin Peay: Drake Reed, Todd Babington, Wes Channels, Fernandez Lockett, Duran Roberson
Another tough one, but “Fernandez Lockett” is pretty damn awesome.
2nd Round:
Memphis: Chance McGrady
Miss: Kodi Augustus
Temple: Dionte Christmas
Pitt: Keith Benjamin
Marquette: Lawrence Blackledge
Stanford: Landry Fields
Sounds like cricket.
Miami: Fabio Nass
Austin: Fernandez Lockett
Sweet 16
Memphis: Chance McGrady
Temple: Dionte Christmas
Stanford: Landry Fields
Austin: Fernandez Lockett
Elite 8
Memphis: Chance McGrady
Austin: Fernandez Lockett
1 comment:
I love Mike's method! Finally something about basketball I understand AND that makes me laugh!
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