Pyschiatric Explorations of the Fetus with Needles

We both watch a lot of Pac-10 basketball, to the point where more than half of our college posts will probably cover the conference. Before writing several posts about Ben Braun’s Cal teams and their curious habit of incurring shot clock violations after timeouts, though, it seems important that we describe the aesthetic experience of watching every Pac-10 program. In all honesty, this post is a bit more formulaic than what we want to do in our NCAA posts, but the groundwork within it is necessary if we ever want to get where we hope to go.

In the NBA, UCLA would be a boring team reliant on defense and one or two scorers. In college, their ball pressure can be so overwhelming that it becomes legitimately thrilling to watch (especially live). There’s also something enthralling about the way they seamlessly segue from steals into the quickest transition game in the conference. It’s possible that their shtick will get old after five or ten years of conference championships, but for now it’s pretty exciting to watch. When you get right down to it, this is one of the few teams in the conference that can make a 52-48 game exciting.



In theory, the USC Trojans are the Hollywood counterpart to the workmanlike Bruins; the basketball programs could switch office locations and it would make perfect sense. This year, USC brings in OJ Mayo, indisputably the most compelling player in the conference. Mayo is supremely confident, a virtual lock to forgo college if he’d had the option. His arrival at USC could signal a major shift in the way one-and-done players approach college. In the past, even the best players (e.g. Carmelo, Oden, Durant) have successfully assimilated themselves into the team/program concept. No one knows for sure if Mayo will go down that road, too, but his arrogance suggests that he could try to run the Trojans on the court much as Kobe does a short drive away. If they play well with Mayo taking nearly half the shots, expect a dramatic change in how coaches and top-flight recruits approach their lone year in college; program prestige might not make a difference.



Stanford has long been thought of as the antithesis of flashy, and that characterization still holds mostly true. Coach Trent Johnson, though, has been recruiting more combo guards and forwards and generally seems to give more positional and play-running leeway than Mike Montgomery ever did. Skilled big man and likely lottery pick Brook Lopez is easily the most talented player on the team, but default point guard/real shooting guard Anthony Goods and forward Lawrence Hill were the best indicators of the team’s success last year; when they were on, the team almost always won. Like the Monty teams, this year’s Cardinal will win with defense and rebounding, but the complete lack of a point guard will likely cap the team’s potential. It will be interesting to see how much the core (2-5 capable of a big run in the tournament) can achieve with sketchy point guard play. (Note: Carter and I both went to and root for Stanford and thus find the team more interesting than most.)


Along with Stanford, Arizona was the class of the conference for most of the late 90s/early 00s. Recent years have seen them fall off despite bringing in the same exceptional Lute Olson recruiting classes; leading some to question if Lute’s lost his heart for coaching 20-year-olds. This year’s class is no different from previous ones, with combo guard Jerryd Bayless highlighting things. The Wildcats have turned into a model of inconsistency in the last few years, and I’d expect that to continue next season.


After an out-of-left-field season last year and a likely preseason Top 10 ranking, the Washington State Cougars will have a lot of pressure on them next season to establish the program on the national scene. Their style of play is similar to UCLA’s in that they rely on defense, but at this point the Cougs don’t have enough offensive or defensive firepower (not to be confused with people who can score or defend well) to make them especially exciting to watch. I don’t care how young or cool Tony Bennett is; he’s still a Bennett.



If Wazzou can become a player on the national stage, they’d likely knock the Washington Huskies down a peg in the conference hierarchy for the foreseeable future. Last year, Lorenzo Romar had a bit of an identity crisis on his hands, with big men Spencer Hawes and Jon Brockman giving the Huskies a clear strength inside even though their system is designed for quick, athletic guards like Nate Robinson and Brandon Roy. With Hawes banished to Sacramento and no truly stellar guards on the roster, it remains unclear if Romar will return to the running style that got U-Dub to where it is today. It’s entirely possible that next year’s record will be inconsequential to the direction of the program.


With another year like the 2007 Elite Eight run, the Oregon Ducks would vault themselves onto the shortlist of the best programs on the West Coast. Of course, they also lost Aaron Brooks, the equivalent of Brandon Roy to Washington two years ago, and Coach Ernie Kent has a history of following one good year with three bad ones. This year’s team is led by 5-6 (he’s actually shorter) Tajuan Porter, but I’d be surprised if they go with the four-guard lineup again, which means that they’ll be the same old frustrating Oregon. Prove me wrong and remain exciting!


Cal had a transitional year after losing the bullish Leon Powe to the NBA, although things might have been different had DeVon Hardin, their major inside presence and likely first-rounder next June, not missed the entire conference season with an injury. Coach Braun adjusted to the loss of Hardin by switching to a four-out motion offense, which actually loosened things up quite a bit; they really looked like a much more fluid offense and would have been something with Hardin. The question now is whether or not Braun will return to the same dull sets (they basically run the Stanford offense, except Braun has no idea how to coach offense) he’s used for the majority of his time in Berkeley. Strictly in terms of players, the Hardin/Ryan Anderson post combo brings an intriguing mix of power, athleticism, and skill that you won’t really find on any other team in the Pac-10 (Lopez twins come close, but they’re similar enough that Anderson and Hardin are probably more interesting). They also have Jerome Randle, my favorite point guard in the Pac-10, although he nearly found himself in legal trouble last week.



Arizona State held the distinction of being the best worst team in any major conference in 07. They only won two games in conference last season, but they had a number of close contests against some of the best teams in the league and steadily improved. Their returning players aren’t particularly exciting at this point in time, although Jeff Pendergraph could play in the NBA and Derek Glasser looks like something approaching the next Chris Hernandez (high praise from this website). McDonald’s All American James Harden comes in for some extra oomph. In reality, they’re a few years from making real noise, and the Princeton offense isn’t exactly the most exciting thing to watch when it’s not being run by Georgetown.


That leaves Oregon State, the most uninspiring team in the conference by far. Watching a game broadcast from Corvallis is like happening upon a feed from a high school gym: deathly quiet, occasional cheering, general snuff film feel. Marcel Jones is pretty fun to watch, but other than that this team is just depressing. It’s been that way for a while; I guess there’s something to be said for uninspiring dependability.