Hunted By A Freak

The draft combine numbers came in today, and it's safe to say that Greg Oden graded out fairly well (link also has complete list of results in Excel document). First, he ran the 3/4 court sprint just .07 seconds slower than Oregon point guard Aaron Brooks, who can't be taller than 5-9 (I've stood next to him, and I'm not sure he's even that tall) and gets by primarily because of his speed. Oden also completed the lane agility drill in 11.67 seconds, which comes in .02 faster than Corey Brewer and just .04 slower than best friend Mike Conley. Safe to say, Oden is an athletic monster. I tried to find Amare Stoudemire's combine numbers and failed, but let's assume that Oden's numbers show that he's as athletic as Amare. Combine those talents with Oden's unreal defensive skills and the apparent semblance of a post game, and you have the next great center in the NBA. I am convinced that this man will not fail. I almost expect him to kill someone with a dunk or block.



Kevin Durant did a bit worse than Oden. His sprint and agility times were fairly solid, but definitely not the sorts of numbers you want to see from a prospect of his level. Most troublingly, KD was the only player who lifted not to complete one rep. Now, everyone knows Durant is skinny and needs to put on weight, but, for the love of god, HE COULDN'T COMPLETE ONE REP. That seems like a sign that he'll get pushed around for at least a year whenever he goes inside. Durant should still average 20 ppg as a rookie just on his ridiculous skills, but don't expect any instant savior shit.


I've been falling back on my Warriors posts because of LeBron and the top of the draft, but I'll be back soon with something on GSW in free agency this summer.

I Like the Misery, I Like this World

Great post on the power of Bonzi over at freedarko, which captures a lot of the reasons I've been hoping the Lakers consider using the MLE or part of it to get him in L.A. If we could then get Artest with Kwame+picks+filler, I'd be officially stoked. I am well aware that neither of these moves help our most immediate needs at point guard or center, but just don't care. After watching Golden State and Utah recklessly throw the concept of positions in the air, I'm hoping the Lakers take the plunge. If they can top it all off by getting Jermaine O'Neal for Bynum/Odom/filler, it would be an extremely compelling team at the very least.

The frontcourt of JO, Ronny, and Mihm would be dangerously thin, and this puts a lot of faith in FarmarSuperstar at point. Nevertheless I'd go through with these deal because we gotta:

• Appease Kobe. All 3 of these moves would go a long way to cooling off Kobe. Artest apparently at some point expressed his desire to be a Laker to Kobe and management not acting on that (or Boozer or Baron) seemed to be one of his bigger gripes. Kobe's been friends with Jermaine since they came into the league together. Peter Vecsey has already theorized that management's plans to acquire JO were what caused Kobe to relax his demands mid-day. And as FD pointed out already, Kobe would love a guy like Bonzi on his team. These moves are all risky, but they're the kind of swing-for-the-fences attitude that it seems like Kobe wants to see from front office.
  
• Ease his burden. All 3 of these guys can help bear the scoring burden on nights when Kobe doesn't feel like killing himself to get 50. But more importantly, Artest helps ease Kobe's defensive duties by letting him escape some of the tougher assignments, and finally having a legitimate shot-blocker with Jermaine would go a long way to helping some of our defensive woes at other positions.
• Put on a show. Because of a geographic quirk, the Lakers (but not the Clips) are required to be entertaining. And with Bonzi, Artest and JO riding with Kobe, the Lakers would be thrilling to watch on and off the floor. Trying to navigate all those personalities would be one of Phil's toughest challenges yet. The potential storylines could be hilarious and awe-inspiring.

I guess I'm not too worried about the PG situation because I think there would be enough versatile guys available that Phil could find creative ways to make it work. When Farmar's not on the floor, I have no problem with letting Kobe carry those duties. There were times last year where it felt like Smush or Shammond were out there simply because the staff felt like they needed someone with PG next to his name on the floor. I think the depth of the frontcourt would only really become an issue against teams like San Antonio (and eventually Portland) that still play two legitimate big men. The presence of Artest would probably make Luke expendable, so maybe we sign-and-trade him to bring back a body. Although losing Luke and Lamar could be dangerous for our ball movement and stifle the triangle.

Obviously each of these moves faces serious obstacles. Now that Adelman's in Houston Bonzi isn't nearly as up for grabs as he could have been. Sacramento is still deluded into thinking a rivalry exists and will be hesitant to dump their problem child to us, especially for the crap offer of Kwame and picks. Getting the contracts to work with Indiana probably means them taking on Vlad which would be hard to swing; plus they seem to want to include Tinsley in the deal which would almost certainly require Kwame's contract.

Nonetheless, I think some variation of these deals remains possible, and I wouldn't mind if Bonzi is the starting point. Sign Bonzi, then make a run at Zach Randolph with Kwame's contract, and let the headcases go wild. Who wouldn't be intrigued by the Farmar/Bonzi/Kobe/Lamar/Randolph lineup? Let the madness take over.

The H Is O

When was the last time someone dominated every offensive possession while only making three field goals?

What would the Cavs look like if they had three guys who could hit open threes, instead of just one in Daniel Gibson?
Looking ahead, I don't know if the Cavs can win more than one game against the Spurs, but I expect LeBron to own Bowen consistently. If LBJ can match Iverson's production in his lone finals, the next series will be a legitimately historic moment in NBA history, yet another signal that this man will own the East for the forseeable future.

As for the Pistons, this seems like the end of their run. The Chuckster just said it right, "they didn't play well in any game." It's a shame to think what they could've been if they'd drafted Carmelo instead of Darko.


At the very least, the finals just became something that needs to be watched, even if the outcome is predictable.

And Reggie Miller talks like a Bill Cosby impression.

Watch the Tapes

I would have written an ecstatic, intoxicated post on LeBron's motherfucker of a game last night, but I decided to hitch my star to a major that schedules important events during the greatest sporting events ever, so I still haven't seen anything other than the last overtime. So, my humble request of our admittedly less-than-gigantic readership is: does anyone have a tape or DVD of this game that they can send me (either electronically or escargotically)? I will obviously pay any shipping and production costs and be in your debt for a long time. Hit up the comments if you can help out.

The Leak was Not the Primary Target

The Category 2 Shitstorm has officially been upgraded to a Category 4 Clusterfuck.

I figured Kobe would give me a few days before making my last post obsolete, but instead he gave me a few hours. And honestly I'm reluctant to write anything now because by the time I finish writing this post, I just know there will be some new update where Phil's pulled his Zen shit and calmed him down or Kobe's gone on PTI and announced his retirement.

Here are my hopes:
-Kobe's feeling a bit nostalgic for the circus days of old, so is stirring the pot just to make it interesting.
-Phil can do wonders to calm him (particularly because it seems that it was his revelation of the 5 year rebuilding plan that was one of the main sore spots)
-Jim Buss, Kupchak, whoever the Lakers insider was, whoever else ever looked at Kobe the wrong way, let the heads roll
-The keys to L.A. are given to Jerry West to do whatever he'd like to the Lakers, Clippers, Dodgers, Angels, Kings, Ducks, City Council, you name it.

Here's my fear:
Kobe sounded pretty irreconcilable on Steven A.'s interview. I'm not sure how you step back from this ledge. When you say straight up that there's nothing management can do to keep you there, how do you soften that? JONESONTHENBA's take sounds about right: He's been maneuvering the media just right the past couple days to make him seem totally vindicated gearing up for this demand.

I'm still not prepared to get too bogged down in the trade possibilities because I'm not sure I've accepted it yet. The optimist in me says it sounds like once Phil talked to him he'll take some time to calm down and think rationally about this. But when the time does come (and I'm gradually accepting that it probably will), Chicago is still the only possible place I see. Rooting for Tyrus Thomas someday would be a small consolation, but fingers are still crossed. Steven A. seems to have the most intimate knowledge of the situation of all the talking heads, and he seems to think despite all the shit stewing "at the end of the day" Kobe will be a Laker once Kupchak disappears and West comes back.

What I Say Is Not a Revelation...

"...there's nobody on this planet who thinks we have a team that can contend for a title right now." - the KB on the Lakers not named Kwame.

I go away for one weekend with plans to write a post on whether we should be trading for Pau, Jermaine, Kidd, etc., blah blah blah, and come back to find that's the last thing on anyone's mind right now. Shit's been hitting the fan in Laker Land, and honestly, anything happening in the next couple weeks would not surprise me at this point. A couple of weeks ago I saw this Steven A clip and wrote it off as him trying to stir up drama:


Now after hearing Kobe's interview on KLAC verifying every one of Steven A's claims, I really don't know what to think anymore. He sounded hurt by the Caron trade, bitter about the inaction of management with Artest, Boozer, and Baron, and furious over the different message they sent Phil about the time frame of their rebuilding plans. Throw in the West situation, the Buss family catastrophe (what a rough couple days the Dr.'s having), and a Lakers "insider" blaming Kobe for the Shaq trading, and I can't help but fear that a trade demand is imminent if front office doesn't do some serious massaging and quick. The fact that no one has contacted him since exit meeting does not feel like a good sign. I've long been on the "There's no way he's getting traded anytime soon" train, but this latest Kobe media barrage with the 570 interview, the 710 interview, the KB24 post, and the Bucher article, I'm starting to feel like this is more than the typical pressuring front office to make a move. At this point if they want to keep him around, they might need to just hand the keys over to West if he's willing to take 'em. I know with his age, his loyalty to Mitch, his past with Phil, his son playing in West Virginia, that might be problematic, but desperate times and all that. I'm sure with the right number of zeros the Logo can find ways to get back to see his son's games.

I really hope this is just his way of forcing the Lakers to bring West back. While I'm not sure if he'd be the panacea Kobe is hoping, his track record is pretty impressive. Even looking at what he's done with Memphis, while this year was tankified, they won 4 more games than the Lakers last year and 11 more the year before that. Basically if that's what it takes to soothe Kobe (his list of complaints is long and valid), it's worth it in my view. If it sparks some life into management and the Lakers pull off some bold moves this summer, all the better. I'm not even asking he pull another rabbit out of his hat with a Vlade for Kobe type deal, how about just any deal that rids us of Vlade's snowboarding buddy.

Amid all the bombs Kobe dropped yesterday, one of the less-talked about nuggets from the interview was basically his singling out of Lamar and Luke as two guys who cared and gave it their all despite injuries. That seems about right as an outsider, although I'd probably add Farmar and Turiaf to the short list of guys in a Laker uniform with a pulse this post-season, but it's understandable why Kobe left them out considering their age and inability to contribute greatly. Ironically, this came out in his response claiming that he wasn't calling out his teammates with his public demands, just management, but it sure sounded to me like a subtle way of questioning the commitment of some of the other guys.

I can't even really get fully into the, "Can we possibly trade Kobe and for what?" debate just yet; basically I want to wait and see if his talk escalates from here or gets appeased quickly with West re-entering the fold. Basically it sounds like if does come to a head, Chicago is where he would want to be and the team with the most pieces to put something together. If we start hearing about Deng, Gordon, AND Thomas, I'll be interested.



Other takes on this shitstorm:
Forum Blue and Gold
Bandwagon L.A.
Sports at Random
True Hoop

When the Last Time

We haven’t posted anything in quite some time, so I thought it would make sense to run down some basketball happenings from around the country. Most of these nuggets have some bearing on our favorite teams, but in reality this post just allows me to say I put something up without actually writing a coherent article. It’s like I’m Bill Simmons or something. Without further ado:

Roy Hibbert Pulls Out of Draft, Owns NCAA
Georgetown center Roy Hibbert, a junior, decided to pull out of the NBA Draft last week. My initial reaction was that this choice seems a bit nonsensical given that he was likely going to get picked in the top 10, but closer analysis proves that this was probably a smart decision. First, not that many top 10 teams need a center. Discounting Portland and Seattle, who will take Oden and Durant, of course, Minnesota and Sacramento appear to be the most likely candidates to take a five, but those teams have other needs and quite possibly could have passed on Hibbert. As such, there was no guarantee that he would go in the first round.

Second, Hibbert is going to rock the entire NCAA next year. In the Big East, UConn’s Hasheem Thabeet is probably best qualified to match up with him in the post, but Thabeet is extremely raw. In the nation, few players have the tools to best Hibbert. If you remember back a few months ago, Hibbert had minor trouble with Oden in the Final Four, but that was Greg Oden. Point being that Hibbert should have no trouble dominating his opponents next year, meaning that he will likely find himself the top big man chosen in what looks like a mediocre draft for posts. Good call Roy.

As for the Warriors and Lakers, Hibbert’s move means that they’ll each have one less player to pick from at 18 and 19, respectively, as there was no way Roy was going to last that long. Bummer.

Brandon Rush Pulls Out of Draft
This decision to stay in college, on the other hand, probably shows why Brandon had a less than easy time qualifying out of high school. Rush is undoubtedly one of the best perimeter defenders in the nation, but he’s somewhat limited athletically (i.e. not a stud). Given those talents, he was likely to go somewhere in the last half of the first round this year, although reports varied on exactly where that would be. Of course, Rush is probably going to be the same kind of player next year, and it’s unlikely that he will improve his stock much (see Afflalo, Aaron c. 2006). Expect some playoff team to draft Brandon in 2008, with the expectation that he’ll be a solid role player for many years in this league.

More bad news here for our teams. Rush actually had a decent chance to go to either Golden State or LA, and I think he would have helped both clubs quite a bit. The Warriors need one or five more defenders, and the Lakers need anyone with a pulse on either side of the ball.

Update: It turns out Brandon Rush tore his ACL and will miss something around six months. This is obviously a very good reason to pull out of the draft, rendering my whole first paragraph stupid. All of us at Plissken wish Brandon well in his recovery.

The NBA Playoffs Still Exist, Apparently
The conference finals are in full swing, although you wouldn’t know it if you actually watched the games; these things barely hold my interest more than a meaningless regular season game between the same teams. But, I guess they’re still important, so we wouldn’t be worth anything as an NBA blog if we didn’t at least touch on the subject.

Let’s start with the West, where the Spurs hold a predictable 3-1 lead on the Jazz. I must confess that this series is actually more interesting than I thought it would be, although that’s mostly because of the first two games, in which San Antonio completely dominated Utah. Spurs games are much more exciting to me in blowout form, likely because in close games I always feel like Duncan et al. are just forestalling the eventual outcome of a Spurs win because they feel like. In blowouts, though, they look like a mechanical beast steamrolling the competition, and seeing them embrace their nature as coldhearted killers just feels right. Let’s have some more of that in Game 5.

The Pistons-Cavs series, like all of the Eastern Conference, has featured some absolutely dogshit basketball, the kind of stuff you expect to see in a January game between Oklahoma St. and Texas Tech. As far as I can tell, no one on the Cavs other than LeBron would get starter’s minutes for any Western playoff team, and the Pistons look incapable of winning any game in this series by more than five points. This one is really only interesting when LBJ plays either awfully or wonderfully, and even then those performances won’t really mean much if they lose until we can situate them in the eventual LeBron Narrative.

Kobe Kinda Sorta Demands Zeke from Cabin Creek
A few days ago, Kobe said that he would demand a trade if Dr. Buss didn’t bring in Jerry West to make all personnel decisions, but now it seems he’s rescinded those comments. I should probably let my associate Carter handle this issue in greater depth, but I think Kobe’s gripes with Kupchak are completely legitimate: the dude hasn’t done much to make this team better (like drafting project centers in the top 10 when he has the best player in the NBA in his prime) and I can't think of any great moves he's made (several good ones, though).

(In an earlier version of this post, I underrated West as a GM because I forgot about a lot of his pre-Shaq moves. Apologies.)

As far as trading Kobe, I often say that the Lakers should at least consider it, if only to see what they could get, but that’s a topic for another time.